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Summer holidays so far (2018)

It didn’t start well, my son had a meltdown on his last day at school and we were called by the school to take him home in the afternoon. I gave in and said to my mum to collect him, and stop the school from losing face and embarrassment at the end of the school day from other hawking eye parents. I know it was another illegal exclusion, but I was thinking more of my son’s feelings, but this cannot go on into year 1. To be honest my son has been doing better and progressed to a normal full time timetable for the last few weeks of school, has been joining in and attending lunch time and playtime, and has coped without a major meltdown since April. The last one was at his first full day school excursion with his current school. I did ask the school for a full explanation of the end of term/academic year incident to pass on to the paediatrician at our next child development clinic appointment, but being the end of term/academic year and all, we didn’t get one and not holding my breath that we will get anything useful or accurate from the school about that now.

I did fear that summer holidays would now become something negative and ominous, but just a few days away from school, my lo appeared to settle down and become more relaxed, and much better behaved. He has been spending a mixture of his time at holiday club, with his nan, quality time with his dad and with both of us fully at the weekends. We have had no reported incidents at holiday club since April (his first session there) until the day we unexpectedly had to try a full day due to lack of childcare, my mum had to attend a short notice and urgent hospital appointment a couple of weeks back and we only had originally planned to send him for a half day morning session. Unfortunately he did not cope well during the lunch time session there, and had a full on meltdown. However, the holiday club are actually much better at communicating incidents to us and I have a written report, something concrete to pass on to our child development clinic appointment this week, although I don’t know how much use these appointments are right now. After 45 minutes he did calm down and rejoin activities, and the holiday club have welcomed him back and have been very professional so far. Fortunately for my mum all the test results came back clear, and she will be monitored for a year for a couple things that they did find on the scan, but so far looks like nothing nasty.

We have also started sending my son to summer school and getting him extra tuition, which I know seems a bit early as he is only 5 years old. However, one bedtime he told me he was upset about getting things wrong in his phonic lessons and it seemed to bother him, and I don’t want him feeling sad about that and it hasn’t been fair that he has missed almost half a year of school, because the school cannot manage his behaviour. I saw a local education centre that accepts childcare vouchers, we haven’t been using them much as we have been prevented from accessing wraparound care due to his reduced timetable. I had this education centre in the back of my mind as something we might use in the future, and not necessarily now as I didn’t want to put him under pressure. I really wanted learning to be fun for him, but I have fast track these thoughts as I want him to feel confident and not left behind, so far he has had one assessment and 4 lessons, and it seems to be positive so far and it is nice to see him feel like he has accomplished something after each session. He still has a long way to go to catch up, mainly early reading and writing, but it is a start, and we are continuing these lessons in term time after school.

The family holiday last week was so so, very good moments and then low moments. I can’t fault my son’s behaviour when out and about he was mostly fine, apart from the long journey back home, but think we were all tired and tetchy. However, every time we were back at the holiday cottage having some down time, my son was quite rude and obnoxious at times (hard to believe he looks like an angel), and completely different child to one when we are taking him out to places and doing activities. To be honest it tried mine and my OH’s patience, mine probably more so. Also we were struck down by what seems now as two tummy bugs, my son in the early hours of Wednesday morning and me on Friday morning last week. I thought the days of dealing with vomit on holiday was behind us, but obviously not. Also not sure whether that had a part to play in my son’s downturn in behaviour as it was really towards the end of the holiday his behaviour started to become grating or whether some of it was just boredom, he seems to get bored quite easily and better now we are home with his toys, which at least seem more exciting to him again. We both got over our illnesses quickly and I was pleased that I still managed to get myself ready to go on a seal boat trip that Friday morning, and not let anyone down. Although when we got back to our holiday cottage that afternoon, I started to feel bad again with a low grade fever so had to hand childcare duties completely back to my OH while I rested in bed and they had fun spending my money at a amusement arcade and going to a local park that has this fantastic playground ship, very realistic looking and lots of fun for kids. Although spitting boy incident (not my son I hasten to add) on it earlier in the week will always slightly taint the good memories.

Still back to reality, son is back doing some part day sessions at holiday club, last week of them and hope he gets on okay. We have our next paediatrician appointment later this week, not sure what to expect from it or whether I will get a ticking off for not arranging to attend the sleep workshop earlier in the year, but I cannot take any more time off of work to attend these daytime workshops plus cover childcare in school holidays to give my mum a break who has been supporting us throughout my son’s reduced timetable and my attendance is now being monitored at work due to taking one week off of sick, pah! Anyway just over 2 weeks of summer holidays left as I have previously said not sure whether I am looking forward to him going back to school as for one thing, although the childcare is difficult to cover over the school holidays particularly the summer one, the phone calls about my son’s behaviour or the fact they cannot manage it have ceased. So some external sources of stress has temporarily diminished. However, we shall see how he progresses into year 1 and whether he does really need an EHCP, as I am still baffled.

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Blogging

Holidays

Half term holidays have begun, and to be honest the lead up to that hasn’t been great. We were hoping that my son would have started settling into his new school by now, but no, seems to have gone a step backwards and has got himself excluded for the second time round after having another emotional meltdown in their care, this time over he feels he was wrongly accused of hitting someone. Whether he hit someone or not, teacher says she didn’t witness it, but told him off anyway in her ‘we don’t hit’ kind voice apparently, I am not happy with the way it was handled. I cannot excuse his overreaction, but feel this needn’t have escalated in the way it did. Cannot see a paediatrician where we use to live anymore as they realise we are now out of area, so basically just left us to fend for ourselves. I put a complaint in, which consequently got them to pull their finger out and help us make two new referrals in our new area, one for a second opinion as the paediatrician thought he had no medical conditions such as autism. I don’t know whether he has, I agree that if he does it is not obvious. I suggested to the school as I was running around in circles at the time trying to get these referrals made that they can refer him themselves and they said they do not have enough evidence, which exasperates me, as they have enough evidence to cause us to take him home early twice and find it difficult to say something positive about my son’s time in school.

Beyond the school troubles, we are settling more into our new home and our son’s behaviour has started to calm down at home, as he was quite hyper and getting a bit disrespectful. We are continuing to go to a Gymnastics club here, which he is persevering with, it is quite different to his old one so he is getting use to it still. I think the old one was a better fit for him and he found the class structure more familiar, as there was a repetitive routine, with only slight changes. This one seems to be slightly different each week, plus there is less coaches and apparatus, but he surprises me and is giving it go, and wants to return, so that is the main thing. He loved the new local weekend playgroup, despite my partner hating it, but we are going back next weekend and my partner said he will try to be less grumpy hehe So what can I say we are not getting the behaviour that school experience with us, yes, he tests the boundaries every now and then, but not having destructive meltdowns with him and not seeing him be aggressive with other children in our care either, yes, he has less opportunity as he is our only, but we do take him to places where there are other children.

We started the half term by visiting a local farm, the sun was out, but was very cold still so we had to wrap up warm. However, he had a lovely time exploring all of what the farm had to offer.

Collage crafts at the farm

Crafts at Standalone Farm

Collage crafts at the farm

Crafts at Standalone Farm

Train ride

Play area at Standalone Farm

Action shot with daddy Sand pit fun

Sand pit fun in the sun

What a pair?

Baa!

Model railway

We look forward to having more fun together during our half term break and forget about any school troubles until our next meeting, groan!

Take care my lovelies